Many people may not believe this, but it’s true:
At the end of the day, writing here is easy. The only people who read it are people who want to know more about survivors and their stories. I can talk easily about being a survivor without fear that someone will simply wish I hadn't told them that. In real life, it's a bit harder to tell who would want to discuss it and who would rather not.
That was from this post:
It’s still true. I can’t see your reaction to reading about my abuse; when I tell someone in person, their reaction is right there in front of me. It can be very uncomfortable.
Elsewhere in the archives:
The thing is, we come across people running on fumes every day. When we deal with the staff at a coffee shop, restaurant, or store that is massively short-handed, or an office worker who just found out someone in their workplace tested positive for COVID and they're worried about whether they brought it home to the spouse, or child, or even a CEO who is wondering how to keep the business running without losing all of her employees to burnout. We are all, in one way or another, running on fumes, and there isn't enough sugar and caffeine to keep doing this forever.
How We Talk to Ourselves Matters
There is a better way, and the examples can help if we are willing to practice them. I especially like the idea of reminding ourselves that we’ve already been through tougher and more stressful situations and come out the other side.
That’s a powerful reminder for survivors. We have been through worse and come out the other side.
Why Photography is Mental Health Self-Care for Me
Personally, I struggle with mindfulness. My brain tends to move a million miles an hour in six different directions most days. On good days, I can rein it in and focus on one or two things. On bad days, well, it’s chaotic in there. A hobby like photography requires not only focus, but also stilling my brain long enough to notice my surroundings. It’s a kind of forced mindfulness for me because I enjoy taking photos, and getting better at photography is an ongoing lesson in slowing down and paying attention.
I especially enjoy photographing new places and nature. Both require me to move. Photography often prompts me to explore a location, which involves movement. Like a forced mindfulness practice, it’s also a bit of forced exercise that gets you time in nature.
Let’s Talk About Your Friend with Social Anxiety
Someone you know is likely struggling with anxiety. Likely, many of you are, too, just like I am. With general anxiety rampant across society right now, we can also assume that a large portion of social anxiety is going around, too. If you have a friend who has struggled to keep plans or stay in touch, be kind. Recognize their anxiety and take a small action that shows you are happy to see them. For me, it's a sincere hug or smile when I see them. It's an immediate reminder that they want to be with me. There is an undeniable feeling that seeing me makes them happy.
As she described the process of being aware of yourself, your strengths, your weaknesses, it really sounded a great deal like doing a bit of therapy. It also made me very aware of the fact that because I had gone through therapy, and years of learning about how my childhood affects my view of the world, I was way ahead of the game in this regard. Most people don't take the time to truly learn about themselves. Survivors who are truly trying to overcome and become more than victims have no choice but to go through this process.