Child Abuse Survivor - Issue #161
Anxiety from 2020 looks a lot like 2025
I was looking at the history of my blog when putting together the section below from the archives. Five years ago this week, I wrote a post about the COVID-19 pandemic as we started understanding what was happening.
As I read it, aside from some links to things that have since gone away, I thought about how much this feels like today.
When Anxiety is the Norm – Right Now
Thank you for reading the Child Abuse and Mental Health Survivors newsletter. Each week, I share new blog posts and other resources that aim to help survivors of childhood abuse and those who are struggling with mental health issues feel less alone as we discuss the issues surrounding our issues.
For more information about me and why this newsletter exists, visit the website - Child Abuse Survivor.
To quote myself from March 2020:
We are all anxious. We are all capable of overreacting and being less than gracious right now. But when this is all over, and regardless of what happens to me as an individual, I know what I want the people who are important to me to remember about how I handled myself. I want them to remember I did what I could to encourage, love, and support them.
In short, I did my best on the things I could control, even though I know there is so much I cannot control right now.
That goal remains. I will do what I can to support survivors and encourage all of us in our mental health and healing journeys. I didn’t need the US government to do that before, and I will continue to do it now while also calling out those who are harming people instead of supporting them.
That’s what I can do. What can you do?
New from the Blogs
Sharing - Advice, resources for parents of children with mental health issues
It all comes down to having safe, supportive, and involved adults (parents and others). Kids need that more than anything else. No social media or screen bans can replace that.
Quick Thought #23 - Change is Needed, but Callousness is Not
As I have said many times, solving the mental health issues that plague the US will involve a lot of hard work, difficult conversations, and measured steps to create positive impacts for all of us. Adults need to be adults and have mature discussions about how to help as many suffering people as possible.
What we're seeing from our government now is anything but adults being mature.
Sharing - Language That Deepens Trauma Instead of Healing It
The amount of courage and effort it took to tell you deserves more than a dismissive comment.
Social media may be a problem for some teens, but online interaction that leads to friendships would be remarkably good for them. Simple bans aren't going to have much of an impact, but giving kids opportunities to bond and make friends will. How do we do more of that?
Sharing - Love live music? Here’s how it is secretly boosting your mental health
Last year, my wife and I decided our mantra would be "buy the ticket, go to the show" as often as possible. This year, we saw our first show last week and have been busy making plans for more, traveling in some cases and simply driving to New Orleans after work in others. I know it helped me get through 2024. I don't know that it will solve everything 2025 brings us, but I know it will be a positive event for us and that the effects covered in the article below are accurate.
A related shared link - Can Music Help With Mental Health Issues?
Linked - Why Most Workplace Mental Health Programs Fail
If your employees don't feel safe, all the policies and resources in the world won't matter. Having good mental health benefits is great, but making the environment safe for employees who take advantage of them is better.
Shared from Elsewhere
Having a partner is great. Having friends is also essential.
Why your friends may be better for your mental health than your partner
Related - Here’s 8 Books I Read on Making Friends This Month
This article is about watching someone you love become lost to you through their mental illness, but I think many of us who survived child abuse know the feeling of grieving for the family we no longer have contact with. - The Complex Grief of Ambiguous Loss: Losing Someone Who is Still Present
This might seem silly, but we never learned how to do it:
Forgiveness is Not Necessary for Healing- I’ve always considered it a choice, not a necessity.
We continue to learn more about this - Early-life adversity Reshapes Brain Development and Behavior.
Some timely advice - Doomscrolling in a time of tariffs: Expert insights on the news cycle and mental health
Sharing for the podcast listeners among my readers - 6 Podcasts That Prioritize Black Women's Mental Health.
Making a Difference:
Chiefs linebacker Drue Tranquill discusses mental health, looks ahead to event with RemedyLive
Mental health professional uses her heart, skills to help those often overlooked
WWE superstars team up with Hope Means Nevada to promote mental health awareness
Tampa organization helps strengthen the mental health of immigrant families
Benefit dinner by Heat’s Kevin Love raises $500,000 for mental health programs in South Florida
First-of-Its-Kind Digital Experience Supports Teen Mental Health Through Roblox Gameplay
Olympic gymnast Laurie Hernandez advocates for mental health in visit to campus
From the Archives
What's So Toxic About Positivity Anyway?
This is my biggest problem. Sometimes, sadness, grief, anger, and uncertainty are entirely appropriate, so why are we telling people to ignore those emotions?
How Even Advocates Shame Victims
Advocates, if you genuinely want to support survivors, shout to the rooftops about how damaging abuse is and why it should never be tolerated. I support you 100%.
Let's try and find a way that doesn't also involve telling survivors that they are irredeemable, alright? We have enough undeserved shame to overcome; don't add to it.
The Benefits of Positive Childhood Experiences (PCEs)
Kids who score high for ACEs can get a head start on healing by having more positive experiences where they are safe, loved, and out of vulnerable situations. We should figure out how to help kids have more of that as a society.
It's OK Just to Enjoy Something For Yourself
So do the things that make you happy. Do the activities that help build you up and give you the energy to go on with your life, no matter what they are or whether people on Instagram will applaud you for them. Please do it for yourself because you deserve it, and you are not required to get permission from anyone else to do things you enjoy.
Thanks for reading. If you find this newsletter informative and helpful, please spread the word. That’s the best way to thank me for my weekly effort.