Child Abuse and Mental Health Survivors Information - Issue #143
A birthday fundraiser
Next week is not only the Independence Day holiday in the US but also my birthday. For a few years now, I have done a Facebook fundraiser for the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention because suicide prevention is a key part of what I try to do when sharing my story and the resources I do. I want to do everything I can to help anyone feel a little less alone and more connected to the world.
This year, I became more specific by raising funds for the Trevor Project.
Thank you for reading the Child Abuse and Mental Health Survivors newsletter. Each week, I share new blog posts and other resources that aim to help survivors of childhood abuse and those who are struggling with mental health issues feel less alone as we discuss the issues surrounding our issues.
For more information about me and why this newsletter exists, visit the website - Child Abuse Survivor.
The Trevor Project's research has shown time and time again that LGBTQ+ kids are at a higher risk for mental health issues and suicide. They've also found that the one thing that brings those risks down is having people who accept who they are. I've chosen this nonprofit because its mission is to ensure kids are accepted and supported, and I hope you'll consider contributing as a way to celebrate with me. I don’t have paid subscriptions to this newsletter because it is not about my money. I realize that means that even people who want to say thank you often don’t have a way to buy me a coffee or anything, so I hope you’ll consider donating something to the Trevor Project instead. Every little bit will help me reach my goal.
If you’re not on Facebook and want to help, please make a contribution to the Trevor Project and leave me a comment. I won’t be hurt if you donate to the cause outside of my little fundraiser.
If you’re not in the US and want to support a local resource dedicated to suicide prevention or LGBTQ+ youth, go for it. It’s all about helping kids who are seeing increases in mental health and suicidal ideation right now and letting them know that they are not alone.
If you don’t have any spare cash, share this newsletter with someone you know. I’ll take word-of-mouth advertising, too.
New from the Blogs
The central question of the article below is a good one:
Why Do victims of nonsexual violent crimes usually involve authorities while most rape survivors remain silent?
Most of the article is about adult sexual assault, but she points out that children who are sexually abused face this same question for similar reasons. Those reasons include the shame of being a victim, the risk of not being believed, the risk of being blamed for it, and the complications of reporting someone you know.
Sharing - New Research from Thorn: Financial Sextortion on the Rise, Targeting Teen Boys
The use of AI is a new twist. It's not enough to tell young boys not to send explicit selfies; they also need to understand that someone may use AI to create an explicit image of them regardless. Education must include societal-wide awareness that an image may not be what it appears to be. That has to be part of this. The extortionist's main weapon is the shame of having explicit photos of their victim out among their friends and family. Shame is powerful. When we live in a world where anyone with an internet connection and a photo of your face can turn that into an explicit image of you, we need to eliminate the shame. There's no shame to be had for someone else's bad actions.
Sharing - The Best Way to Reduce Anxiety Is to Make Your Brain Feel Safe
I think back to my childhood and the sexual and physical violence I was subjected to. I struggle with anxiety because my brain is always going back to that time - a time when I was not safe! The things my brain learned then weren't a failure of mental health; they were survival instincts. They were healthy reactions to an unsafe environment. My current challenge is unlearning them now that I am no longer in that unsafe environment. Asking me to do that while I was unsafe would have been dumb. The anxiety was trying to keep me alive.
Linked - Mental Health Reminders in the Workplace.
Could you do something for me? The next time you try to schedule a thirty-minute meeting with someone and see a thirty-minute break between long stretches of committed time, leave that time for them. Find a different time, if possible. Or go even further and commit to finding a time not immediately before or after another meeting. Let people have a few minutes. It's good for all of our mental health.
Shared from Elsewhere
Our understanding of grief is all wrong. I am thankful for people willing to talk openly about what it means. - Navigating the Journey of Grief: Understanding and Managing Loss
Self-care: why looking after No 1 isn’t always best for your wellbeing
A range of scientific studies point to clear physical and mental benefits of supporting friends and family
Here are a couple of articles about topics that you may not know enough about:
Speaking of important topics, this book review reminds us of some - Madness reminds us that health inequities remain present, and political.
Before we leave June behind - Men’s Mental Health Month and Pride Month: Overlapping Importance
Have you heard of pebbling? I liken the idea to small things we can all do to stay connected to the people we care about. I consider what I do with this newsletter, my blogs, and social media my form of pebbling for all of you. - Pebbling: The Simple Act of Sharing Joy
From the Archives
Five years later, and nothing has changed - Sharing - AP Investigation: Many US jails fail to stop inmate suicides.
It’s obvious from the article that the author is very aware of what works for her and what doesn’t, even though some of the things might generally be considered helpful for others. As a survivor, it reminds me that the biggest thing you can do to help yourself in your healing is to know yourself.
Are we, as child abuse survivors, damaged goods? To a certain extent, we are. Being victimized like that as a child leaves long-lasting impressions and issues. On the other hand, it's not exactly a death sentence either. Many people have overcome the issues surrounding being a survivor and lived successful, happy lives.
The other thing about being "damaged goods" is that, to some degree, everyone over the age of 15 is. Everyone you meet comes with their baggage, whether from parental relationships, past romantic relationships, or just life in general. You will never meet anyone without a different perspective on life and the issues they are dealing with continuously. In a sense, we are all damaged goods.
I’ve seen it time and time again: survivors who are so focused on being advocates or supporters of other survivors that they forget themselves. Usually, they burn out, and I don’t see them online anymore. That’s not helping anyone. We need to have a full life, one that being an advocate is part of, not one where being an advocate is the whole thing. It’s not healthy.
Thanks for reading. If you find this newsletter informative and helpful, spread the word. That’s the best way to say thank you for my weekly effort.