Child Abuse and Mental Health Survivors Information - Issue #116
Child Abuse and Mental Health Survivors Information - Issue #116
Youth suicide rates are down - everyone else is up though.
With all the focus, rightfully so, on youth mental health lately, you’d be excused for seeing this headline this week and thinking “Oh that’s good news about kids.”
Youth suicide declined in 2022 amid overall rising rates
The news is not so good for everyone else.
Thank you for reading the Child Abuse and Mental Health Survivors newsletter. Each week I share new blog posts and other resources that aim to help survivors of childhood abuse and those who are struggling with mental health issues feel less alone as we discuss the issues surrounding our issues.
For more information about me and why this newsletter exists visit the website - Child Abuse Survivor.
One of the most interesting statistics for me, personally, was this one:
The biggest jump for any group was among 55-64 year-old men (a 10% jump).
I turned 55 this year. At the time I turned that age, I was also unemployed. I was one of the tens, maybe hundreds, of thousand people in the tech industry who’ve been laid off, and I’ll be honest about this. Looking at myself as a 55-year old man with no job, there were times when I thought “I’m not really anything but a cost at this point in my life.” Luckily, for me, it never got past that and I was able to remind myself of all the ways I give to people who appreciate that.
On the other hand when I saw that statistic and thought about men my age dealing with layoffs or being phased out of their careers, it made sense to me. You can’t retire. You have an uncertain professional future, and society has told you that you are your job. That’s your identity, and now it’s gone.
We need to do better at changing that message. If anything good can come out of this current trend across industries, I hope it’s that we start to see ourselves as more than what we do at work. I also hope we see a trend in people investing more in the other things that we are outside of work, whether that be husband, father, friend, community volunteer, artist, etc. Those things bring value to the world too.
You bring value to the world.
Does it surprise you that the rates for older men are going up so drastically?
New from the Blogs
Loneliness and the Loss of Third Places
We are much more likely to watch Netflix instead of spending time in a third place. We are a culture that is seeing less and less interest in churches, club memberships, leagues, etc., and one that provides fewer clubs, small events, and other spaces for people to hang out in. That has hurt us socially. Media has made us much more afraid of each other, pushing us away from forming communities. (Fox specializes in terrifying their own audience and telling them to keep coming back to learn all the things they should be scared of, and others have followed in their footsteps.)They have helped us become less and less interested in creating third places. If we do gather, it's usually for some specific purpose or event, not something we do on an ongoing basis. So, we never form the bonds that give us a sense of belonging.
We are lonely. That loneliness is causing immense harm. We don't belong anywhere, but we should belong and try to find ways to create a space where people can belong.
For more on third places - check this out.
Sharing - Study finds no “smoking gun” for mental health issues due to Internet usage
When we rush to do something for the children, there's a long history of implementing changes that do not help children. Running out to block teens from using social media might also cut them off from the only source of support they have, especially kids who do not have support at home from their parents. Creating age verification requirements threatens our privacy and creates unlimited risks for identity theft. Rushing to do something because a few studies show a possible mental health risk is dangerous.
Sharing - What’s going on in depression to make negative beliefs so sticky?
When I was dealing with major depression? There was never enough contradictory evidence that would cause me to rethink my feelings, they were too powerful and they were too much a part of me.
Shared from Elsewhere
This is some important advice - "Call them instead. Reaching out needn’t be a one-way street."
The news can be hard to watch - Nonstop images from Israel-Gaza war can affect mental health. How to cope
Also, this - How I Survive the Painful (and wonderful) Holidays
Financial crises damage people’s mental health – our global review shows who is worst affected. - Layoffs, poverty, medical debt, etc. are risks that aren't solved with exercise.
Lastly, it’s important that we recognize lies - 5 Big Lies Our Trauma Wants Us To Believe, From A Psychologist
From the Archives
Sometimes, when we are in the midst of dealing with the absolute worst of our issues, and trying to overcome the effects childhood abuse is having on our adult lives, the best thing anyone can do for us is give us one less thing to worry about.
Self Love Is a Struggle Because We Know Our Own Faults
We never get to see the thoughts of other people if they choose not to share them. We see ALL of our own thoughts, however. That puts us at a disadvantage when it comes to deciding what we “deserve” compared to others.
When Triggered Some of Us Become Different People
Dr. Santos refers to it as being in a warm versus a cold state. In the heat of the moment, we might make decisions that we later regret, and the things we plan to do while we are in a cold state can go straight out the window when we are in a warm state.
Thanks for reading. If you find this newsletter informative and helpful to you, spread the word. That’s the best way you can say thank you for the effort I put in each week.