Many years ago, my wife and I spent some time at Disney World. We were adults with no kids, so we could just enjoy the park however we wanted, and at our own pace. We also watched many a family struggle with kids who didn’t want to do the same things, who were tired and grumpy, or clearly had no interest in waiting in lines and came up with our own little sarcastic comment - “Happiest place on Earth!”
I was reminded of this in the last couple of weeks as we made a couple of trips to check out holiday lights. Again, as adults we could enjoy the lights at our own pace, no worries. We also got to see the kids out past their normal bedtime, or being drug to a lovely hotel holiday display to get the perfect family photo, who clearly had no interest in being there. Same thing, except now the phrase became “It’s freaking magical”
My point is not to make fun of anyone by writing this though. The point I want you to walk away with as we approach the holidays is to embrace the less-than-perfect. The pressure to have the perfect holiday with the perfect family in the perfect setting is ridiculous. No one has that.
Instead of worrying about the perfect holiday find the magic in your own life no matter how imperfect it might be. Even if the holidays are difficult, enjoy a day to yourself instead of work, or enjoy the fact that you can get some great discounts on holiday chocolate starting the 26th.
And if you are spending the time with someone, embrace the stuff that doesn’t work out. When my wife and I were exploring these places we had difficulties with traffic, rain, a less-than-great dinner out but it was all part of the adventure.
And the adventure was pretty freaking magical as it turned out.
New From the Blogs
Consider The Time of Day When Scheduling Therapy
“I think there are some good points to consider when you choose, if you have a choice about the time of day.
As the article mentions, there is no “best” time to go to a therapy appointment because it will be an individual choice. So much of it depends on what you’re doing in the time surrounding the appointment or when you are at your best energy-wise during the day or week.”
Information about Childhood Trauma
“The article talks about the signs of childhood trauma, the causes of trauma, and some suggestions for treatment.
Then the author, Melissa Gooden, suggests books for parents, caregivers, and kids, links to places where they can learn more or get help, etc.
So, when I say go read the whole thing, this is one where you want to do that.”
Shared From Elsewhere
How do I start talking with my kids about their body boundaries and consent?
“Let your child know that they have the right to decide when and whom they want to hug. This is a healthy body boundary.
Give them permission to politely say no if they don’t want to hug or kiss someone. Their decision should be accepted and respected.”
Also see - Talking with Children about Body Safety - A Fresh Perspective
Balancing Technology and Your Mental Health
“Technology has become an integral part of our daily lives, and it has the potential to greatly impact our mental health. On the one hand, technology can provide access to support networks, mental health resources, and self-care tools that can improve our mental well-being. On the other hand, excessive technology use can contribute to social isolation, addiction, and sleep disruption, which can harm our mental health.”
How My Verbally Abusive Past Still Affects My Daily Life
“Recovering from verbal abuse is not quick or static. You may feel fine for weeks, months, or even years. However, you may still face an individual who resurrects these emotions of vulnerability and spirals you back into your past. It's important to recognize that this is a normal healing process, and working through each instance as they come can help you move forward to a better, healthier future.”
Teaching Faculty to Support Student Mental Health
“New resources and guidance are available for instructors keen to help students with mental health issues. Some say it’s too much to ask, others that it’s not enough to help.”
From the Archives
Why Are We Lonely, It’s Too Easy to Let Things Slide
“Not a single day is promised to us.
Send that note. Make that call. Schedule that lunch or coffee. Your work, or that book, or that Twitter beef can wait.”
“That’s why, in my opinion, it can be so very painful to have our individual story diminished, and why it is so offensive when our individual stories are ignored in favor of group stereotypes.”
Sharing – Looking for support during the holidays? Check out these free resources